Warned.

Poop.
If you are grossed out, don't read any further.
You have been warned.

As some of you know, I have been a receptionist at a dental office for about 6 months now. It has been a really awesome job. The office I work in is so comfortable and homey, and smells very pleasant. NOT like a dental office. Nice? Mmmmhmm. 
 Anyway. My job includes answering the ringing phone, calling on patients insurance, making reminder phone calls, scanning files into the computer, filling out postcards to send out each month, fix the rug by the front door that seems to move by itself, and so on.

One fine day our 2 last patients were a married couple. They had 3 kids with them. A 6 year old, 4 year old and 3 year old. They were cuties. I walked away from the front room {where they were playing with toy dinosaurs} for about 3 minutes. Next thing I know...the payroll guy sitting out there comes to me saying the 4 year old is bawling. I walk out and find her hiding behind a wall.
"I-I pooped...I pooped my pants!..." Oh.my.gosh.
Ok so what should I do? The mom's mouth is full of tools, no way she could have come quickly. The dad would have probably been my best option, as he was only getting his teeth cleaned. Did I think of that? no. I grabbed the little girls hand and said 'You don't know me, but come on!'
We were followed into the bathroom by the 3 year old. "I pee'd my pants..."

Are you kidding me?

I sit the pooper on the toilet, she does her business {by emptying the soil in her panties into the toilet}. No, I didn't wipe for her. I mean come on, she's 4! It smelled like a porta-potty and the seat got a bit dirty. {don't worry, I cleaned it. and it has been cleaned several times since the incident.}
The little pee-er pulled her pants down. I was lost at this point. I told her to just take off her panties and put her pants back on. I wrapped the dirtiness in paper towels and put them in a plastic baggy.

For the next 20 minutes the little...uh...cuties sat on their knees, keeping their bums in the air until mommy was done. Funny site.
When she came out and reacted to the news, I was regretting not pulling her away from her root canal to take care of her kiddos. Oops.

I felt relieved when they were gone. Gross, but relieved.
We were about to leave for the day when suddenly I noticed something. A little brown pebble on the ground by my desk. I felt I had my fair share of poop for the day, so "Ms. Roprah", the office manager, was kind enough to pick it {and the 2 others found after} up.

Let's just say...it was a really crappy situation.